There can really only be one topic for this day's post on my blog. Today is Kirby's birthday and it is her day. Some of you already know that I am preparing to lose her; some may think I already have. But my old Samoyed, my faithful friend and companion is still with me and we are celebrating her 13th birthday today.
Kirby came to me in 1998 - a busy ball of white fluff...
... that grew into a beautiful adult dog.
Through the ensuing years, she was with me almost 24/7. At home she did chores with me morning and night, laid at the edge of the arena as I rode, slept with me in the barn when I foaled out the mares and "helped" herd the younguns out the door. Although she was never in the stall she knew when a new foal had arrived and waited for her first peek from the door. Oddly enough, my mares did not mind having her around. At night, she slept by my bed and once alerted me to an intruder. Although not really a watch dog, she guarded both my truck and camper with fierce loyalty. She travelled with me to all reining shows and would not leave the outfit if she saw me preparing to load. She even entertained me and others with tricks - sit, stay, down, crawl, play dead, rollover (all with hand signals), dance and jump through a hula hoop.
We've become even closer, Kirby and I, in these last months. I am reluctant to let her go. Six weeks ago, I called the vet with every intention of taking her in. I couldn't get through the call without tears and, even though I made every preparation for the event, I called the next morning to cancel. Since that day, I have been grateful for every day we have had. In an odd way, I enjoy caring for her. Maybe it is because she needs me, but more likely it is because I need her. I so hoped she would pass away in her sleep at home where she would not be afraid but it has not come to pass.
Kirby is blind but she hears. She takes great comfort in my voice and all the familiar sounds of the house - the television, my steps across the floor, my voice on the telephone... She eats anything she wants now but her appetite is not good so I try different things and hold the dish for her to eat. I have to carry her outside to go to the bathroom.
It's incredibly sad to see her lose her independence. I wish she could talk to tell me what she is thinking. One thing I am sure of: she is very glad I did not get a new puppy. She knows she is still the only dog in my life. Happy, happy birthday, old dog!
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